He “doesn’t even like black girls”


Well then, Fat Al, you’re not guilty.

*GAVEL*

This hilarious statement is a result of Haynesworth dismissing a plea deal stemming from a random act of fuckery that went down at a DC hotel in February.

The eight-page document stated that Haynesworth was attending a birthday party the night of Feb. 12-13 and was ready to pay the bill of more than $800 when his waitress was called over with her hands full of dishes.
Insisting he wanted to pay immediately and before she could drop off the dishes, Haynesworth tapped the woman on her arm and shoulder with his card, according to the court papers. The waitress “looked up and down at herself, as if wondering where (Haynesworth) expected her to put (the card),” when he slid the card down the center of her bra and began touching her breast, the documents allege. He said something to the effect of “Can I do that?,” the documents state.
One witness who saw the exchange believed that the waitress had agreed to let Haynesworth place the card in her bra, but reported that her tone turned stern and she asked him to remove his hand after he touched her, according to the documents. The card was ultimately declined, and another waitress took it back to Haynesworth, prosecutors say in the document.

So why, you ask, did he swat the deal away like a midget halfback trying to block him (when he gave a shit)? Because he doesn’t even like black jawns.

“I didn’t touch her,” Haynesworth responded, according to the document, adding that he doesn’t “even like black girls.”
When police detectives later tried to interview Haynesworth, he spontaneously told them, according to court papers: “I know what this is about, she is just upset I have a white girlfriend. I couldn’t tell you the last time I dated a black girl. She was trying to get with me.”

I can’t even think of anything clever to say about this. Yet. All of the comedy lies in Doughboy’s comments.
*shrugs*

Sources: the AP, The Superficial.

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